Calling Cas
by Attenia
Summary: Sam calls Cas when Dean won't get out of bed. Cas is the only one who can deal with Dean when he's like this. Trigger warnings for self-harm.


"Come on, Dean, get out of bed."

"No. I'm sleeping."

"Clearly, you're not, or you wouldn't be talking to me."

"Shut up, Sam."

Dean turned to face the wall, only to have Sam start poking him annoyingly in the back. "Just tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing is wrong."

"Right. You just drank yourself stupid last night, spent the morning throwing up, and are now refusing to get out of bed, all because nothing is wrong."

Dean didn't bother to answer, pulling the blankets up over his head, hoping his brother would just leave him alone.

"That's it, I'm calling Cas. He's the only one who can deal with you when you're like this."

"Don't you dare," Dean snarled, turning to face Sam and pulling the blankets down enough to glare at him.

Sam ignored him. "Cas! Calling Cas, get down here."

No response. Thank God.

"Cas, it's Dean."

Dean winced at the slight ruffling sound of wings.

"I'll leave you two alone." Sam left without another word.

Dean didn't meet Cas' eyes as the angel pulled up a chair beside his bed. "Hello, Dean."

"Go away, Cas," he grouched.

"Tell me what is wrong."

"Nothing is wrong."

Cas just looked at him, his expression confused. Dean couldn't help but look back into those blue, blue eyes. "I do not understand. You are clearly upset."

"I'm not," Dean growled.

"Did you hurt yourself again?"

Why did he have to sound so gentle and concerned? It was messing with Dean's head.

"No."

Cas reached under the blankets and pulled his arms out. Dean knew he should move away, but somehow, he couldn't bring himself to do it.

The angel rolled his sleeves up, sighing when he saw that Dean's arms were a mess of blood and fresh cuts. "Why do you do this to yourself, Dean?"

Dean shrugged, trying to dodge as Cas put two fingers on his forehead. He failed miserably at dodging, and the cuts vanished instantly. Cas went to the bathroom and returned with a damp cloth, cleaning away the blood. "What happened?" he asked again.

With a sigh, Dean gave up. Cas wasn't going to leave him alone until he got an answer. "Sam and I were working a job. The shape shifter we were chasing had a mother and daughter tied up in their home. Sam was knocked out, and the shape shifter ran. I followed, and managed to kill it, but it turns out there was another. I got back in time to save Sam, but not the mother and daughter. If I'd just stayed to protect them, they'd still be alive."

"You didn't know there was another. You did the best you could."

"Yeah, and it wasn't good enough! Nothing I ever do is good enough, people die, they always die!"

"Tell me what I can do to help."

"I don't know, maybe send me back to hell where I belong?"

"You do not belong in hell."

"Yes, I do, and you know it."

"That is not true."

"Look, just go away, Cas! I don't want you here, leave me alone."

"No."

The next thing Dean knew, Cas was climbing into bed with him.

"W-What are you doing?"

"It is called cuddling," Cas said calmly. "I believe it is comforting to humans."

Dean was speechless as Cas put his arms around him. He didn't even struggle, not knowing how to react. He should pull away, tell the angel to get out of his bed, but he didn't. Against his will, he found himself relaxing into Cas' embrace. He allowed himself to be pulled closer, resting his head on the angel's chest. It felt so good here in his arms.

He found himself sighing as Cas started rubbing his back, and the urge to kiss him was suddenly near-overwhelming. Of course, Dean was used to fighting this urge, but who could blame him, really, with Cas suddenly so close, close enough for Dean to feel the angel's breath on his cheek, feel his steady heartbeat, his strong arms holding Dean so close, so tenderly?

Fuck it, he was at the end of his resistance.

Dean barely even had to move, just tilt his head up and press a light kiss to Cas' lips. He pulled back, watching anxiously. Cas seemed to consider this for a moment, then moved in again, kissing Dean tentatively.

"Cas… is this ok?"

"This is ok," Cas confirmed.

"I mean, you don't have to kiss me just because you're trying to comfort me or something."

"I have wanted to kiss you for a while now, Dean. I did not think you would like the idea, though."

"Why not?"

"This vessel is male. I have only ever seen you kiss females before."

That much was true. Dean had never been into guys… before Cas.

"I've been wanting to kiss you for a while too." Deciding they'd done enough talking, Dean pulled Cas closer for another kiss.

He lost track of time as they kissed slowly, lazily, learning each other's bodies. Dean's cock was hard and aching, and they were close enough that he could feel Cas was in a similar state, but he didn't move to do anything more than kiss for now.

He didn't want to spook his angel, not now that they were finally where Dean had dreamed of for so long, in each other's arms. Cas was different. Dean didn't just want to fuck him. He certainly wanted that, but he wanted so much more than a one-night stand.

When they finally pulled apart, both slightly breathless, Dean rested his head back on Cas' chest.

"Promise me you won't hurt yourself again."

His heart sank. This wasn't the first time Cas had asked, and Dean wouldn't lie to him. "I can't."

"Then promise me that the next time you feel like doing it, you will call me first. We can cuddle and kiss, and perhaps you will not want to hurt yourself after that."

Dean found himself grinning. That sounded like a good idea to him. "Alright, Cas, you have yourself a deal."


End file.
